6 Simple Mealtime Rules for Kids
November 3, 2015
Having a few mealtime rules at the table can encourage pleasant family meals and prepare your child for social eating later on.
A reader inspired this post. She wrote about rules for kids at the table, stating that
The time spent at the table is like any other time in the day, itās part of every day for every one, and thus it also has rules that need to be introduced to children slowly, taking into account their age and development.
I couldnāt agree more.
After all, weāre raising adults, and in the process, we need to teach kids how to operate in the world (nicely), as well as in our own home.
6 Simple Mealtime Rules for Kids
I think all kids should learn manners and these simple rules will get you started:
1. Use polite requests and refusals
Children should learn how to politely ask for food, and refuse it. You can teach your child to verbalize their preferences with words like please, thank you, and no thank you.
We taught our children at a very young age to lead with āMay I please haveā¦ā and āNo thank you (with a smile).ā
Now, as teenagers, they still use āMay I please haveā¦ā when we go out to restaurants and even at home.
To me, these are basic, easy words that give kids the tools to nicely navigate the mealtime no matter where they are.
2. Chew with the mouth closed
For very young children, this will be a difficult task and it may take a few years for your child to master chewing and moving food around in his or her mouth while his lips are sealed.
Be patient while nudging your child toward the goal of chewing with his mouth closed.
3. Don’t talk with food in the mouth
This is an extension of the above mealtime rule. You and I know itās no fun to converse with someone who has food falling out of their mouth while they speak.
{Yes, Iāve met some adults who havenāt mastered this simple eating mannerādonāt let your child become one of them.}
Simply ask that they chew up their food before talking. And wait politely for them to do so.
4. Stay at the table until excused
There is value in teaching your child to wait for others to finish eating. Of course, youāll need to be realistic with how long your child sits at the table waiting for others to finish.
Little ones canāt sit for a 30-minute meal, nor should they be made to.
If your child is finished eating, but there are others who are still eating, have him sit for a few minutes out of respect. Engage him in conversation, and excuse him after a reasonable period or time or, if heās older, when the other diners are done.
5. Use a napkin
Itās natural to want to wipe your childās face if he is getting messy, but this is an easy task to teach. Your child may need some hands-on instruction, and some gentle reminders at the table, but in time, your child will learn how to wipe his own mouth and keep his fingers and hands clean.
6. Pass food around the table
Around the age of 5, children can start to pass platters and bowls of food to the person sitting next to them. When our kids were little, my husband and I situated ourselves strategically between the younger children so that we could help them, while our older children handled passing food on their own.
This approach is called family-style feeding.
These mealtime rules doesnāt need to be oppressive or negative for children. Quite the contrary.
Teaching simple manners helps children manage themselves while sending the message that they are capable human beingsāan important developmental milestone for all children.
What mealtime rules do you have at the table?
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